in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
