So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Randomize
