hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
