I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Randomize
