I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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