Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
