you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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