he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Randomize
