Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize
