I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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