There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
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