cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
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