areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
