I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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