apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
You made out with two different species that night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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