Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize