Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Randomize