you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
So much rum. So many feels.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
