He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
