sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
