so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
