this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
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