I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
