how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
