I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Randomize