I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
