In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
