your thong is hanging out like whoa
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
