Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
In other news, I just burned my penis
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
