My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
