what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
no you cant smoke seaweed
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures