Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
