Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I have tasted many bathrooms
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize