Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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