We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
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you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
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Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.