Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.

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(601): View more from Mississippi

She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.

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(843): View more from South Carolina

got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired

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(864): View more from South Carolina

A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!

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21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Read it at the TFLN blog
(509): View more from Washington

my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl

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(217): View more from Illinois

You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.

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(516): View more from New York

I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner

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(+61): View more from Australia

Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point

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