I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
