i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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