i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
