We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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