The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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