Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize