I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
