Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
