so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
