he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Randomize
