Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
My sheets look like a crime scene.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
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