I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
