Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Randomize
