I hate all girls vehemently.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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