Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
