Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
