Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(404): View more from Georgia

Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.

(1-404): View more from Georgia

Two?

(404): View more from Georgia

Two.

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(404): Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs. (1-404): Two? (404): Two. http://tfl.nu/opzf

Replies (261) Good night (4705) Bad night (79475)
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(419): View more from Ohio

Want to have sex later?

(614): View more from Ohio

This feels like a trap

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(419): Want to have sex later? (614): This feels like a trap http://tfl.nu/uak4

Replies (27) Good night (3513) Bad night (1022)
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(318): View more from Louisiana

I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.

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(318): I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky. http://tfl.nu/cr7y

Replies (36) Good night (3988) Bad night (1066)
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(601): View more from Mississippi

I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.

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(601): I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water. http://tfl.nu/8w2r

Replies (42) Good night (5103) Bad night (976)
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(503): View more from Oregon

My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers

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(503): My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers http://tfl.nu/ouvx

Replies (25) Good night (4465) Bad night (1758)
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(562): View more from California

If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up

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(562): If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up http://tfl.nu/jdv3

Replies (24) Good night (12082) Bad night (1454)
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(802): View more from Vermont

No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.

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(802): No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said. http://tfl.nu/3y67

Replies (11) Good night (706) Bad night (1489)
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(310): View more from California

first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking

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(310): first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking http://tfl.nu/y6y1

Replies (8) Good night (2591) Bad night (721)
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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses

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(780): Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses http://tfl.nu/pn1w

Replies (24) Good night (2158) Bad night (755)
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(+49): View more from Germany

we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!

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(+49): we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?! http://tfl.nu/7d9u

Replies (8) Good night (2489) Bad night (628)
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(734): View more from Michigan

I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets

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(734): I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets http://tfl.nu/shph

Replies (6) Good night (1434) Bad night (530)
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(714): View more from California

They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.

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(714): They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost. http://tfl.nu/dynq

Replies (3) Good night (1981) Bad night (724)
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(514): View more from Quebec

I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.

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(514): I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed. http://tfl.nu/63hq

Replies (3) Good night (1561) Bad night (572)
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(413): View more from Massachusetts

So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.

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(413): So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible. http://tfl.nu/fq23

Replies (1) Good night (644) Bad night (438)
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(512): View more from Texas

just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.

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(512): just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake. http://tfl.nu/j2o2

Replies (4) Good night (383) Bad night (274)

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